The Opening from the Book of Spells

     In the beginning I did not mind stepping foot on the inside of the door that opened from the book of spells. In the beginning my feet were bare, my hair was free from the knotted tangles I usually had bundled up from the stress and the worry, it lay past my shoulders. I skipped and galloped, as everything seemed to be twice as beautiful here. The world beneath me, through this book was enticing, I felt everything. I could see beyond the unseen. It was amazing to feel my spirit part from my physical body. I had everything under control, I could venture the world within the knowledge of the unknown, and I could also go back to my day-to-day life on the flip side. I had the upmost treasurable secret, I could flee and dance, I could sing along with the music lyrics that bounced right off the page. I watched the piano key symbols spin across the room. 

    Dancing angels sang around me so peacefully, I had so many friends here and they are beautiful. They were tall and quick, gorgeous blond and brown hair that I thought was a wig. They wore gowns and cloaks made of satin, they lit candles that were bright but never burned, they had fields and fields full of sunlight, they had swings hanging from the tree branches, they had goodness, and they had joy. 

    They had a large table with small bowls filled with large biscuits, and the food did not cover the table, but there were enough to give to one another. The taste of the large round soft biscuits melted into your mouth and was covered in butter, they were freshly warm like they had just popped straight from the oven into your mouth, but no one was tired from the kitchen, no one sweat in greasy aprons, and no one was too big or too thin. There was no hatred here inside the world from within. 

    I could dance in circles with the angels as we held hands, I could change my dresses made of flowers that flowed past my knees, I was never tired here, my bones never ached, and my sadness had disappeared. I would sit upon a rock where my legs dangled into the fields full of sunlight as I read to the well-behaved children and I too, loved story time. I wore my hair in gorgeous thick buns with dangling earrings that sparkled brightly that matched my teeth. I could walk trails of purple flowers and never burn from the sun. My legs were slender and longer as I wore diamond heeled jewelry onto my feet. Gifts and gifts were handed to me, that I never opened. The crowd of dancing angels were a handful of one hundred to one hundred fifty people. My heart was filled with so much peace, so much love and I loved to sing. Oh, how I loved the world from the within. 

     I do not remember how much time passed me by, the sun did not revolve here. I am unsure how long it must have been. I spun and spun to my heart's content. I felt like I belonged here, I finally had made some friends that were true, I was called straight into this room. I spent so much time here that I had forgotten about my physical body, I had forgotten to care. 

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     My alarm was buzzing louder and louder, the door was thumping, and fear crept through my spine. I felt as if swords had sliced holes through my chest, I cried horrific sobs, but I cannot remember what I said. Tears of loss poured like salt inside of an open wound. I felt of sorrow; I felt of death. Evil eyes surrounded me as they spoke of hunger, evil eyes rolled as they scoffed, and their noses rose. Inside of my grown figure, my heart is merely just a child who was severely hurt. My heart felt a growth of the pain as it cracked while it shattered. No one nearby came to help, they just simply swept and mopped, they hurriedly threw the biggest piece of myself inside the trashcan with a laugh as it dumped. They kicked the barrel as they spat and hurled onto what belonged to me. They threw empty bottles in with a swing, they swarmed in groups that lingered the barrel with chit chat of jealousy, and they wished evil upon me. 

   My eyes became blurry to the clock. I would get myself ready, but I was two hours behind, the nights ended with a tick of a second. Numbers suddenly confused my quick brain as I would collect data. Nothing made sense to me anymore.  I could not speak ever since I opened the door. I would feel the rush of the fly, but my bones cracked, and they ached. My feet were heavy, and I felt like I had piled bricks upon bricks within my shoes. I was slow to receive the call, and I was slow to speak. My heart was heavy from the slicing words and the disrespectful gestures from the ones who pretend. My arms were heavy from trying to swim inside out from the within. My head was heavy from carrying on the extra loads from the flipside, everything was just too quick, as if I were sneaking a look through a clicking camera that had binoculars attached to the rim. 

   I would sleep wakeless dreams of the world with the bright sun, the dancing music, the planted flowers, the endless praying, the continuous joy and the love meant here for me. I walked to enter back through on a casual regular day, but I was turned back around. The time was not today. I grabbed a large buttery biscuit before I was sent off from my trails, but I felt worried and stings of hurt as I watched over the mad treacherous cliff. Panic slipped through my breath, and I was certain I was unable to breathe. Satin cloaks surrounded me, one of them taller and boulder amongst the rest. Whispers on my breaking terrified heart that they would never leave broke cold tears on my emotionless face, it was the first time I have cried since I have slipped through here, inside of this wonderous world from the within, I did not want to, I was not ready to leave this place. I fell to my knees as I sobbed upon the darkness of the cliff. Satin angels held my shoulders one at a time as they whispered guided messages into my restless heart, I did not listen, I did not care, I just wanted to stay in, I wanted to stay right here, although I knew deep down into my soul the messages would appear when I would I need them the most. I am reminded of the love I will have here on earth, the family that needs me today, I must return. I stood to my feet and wiped my cold tears; I kept a vision picture painted on my soul and I would walk through. Today, I would not have large buttery biscuits or sing or read to the small children. Today I will need to be brave.

-Micah Vincent